I have had various conversations with people over the last few weeks about the difficulty that comes with finding a stable ground to walk on when they feel as though they had unsteady upbringing. The cycle is to go through short-lived relationships, careers and living situations. Therefore, struggling to find a life that feels more than some fleeting, transitory experience. Nothing in life is permanent as we know, but the struggle deepens when we are reluctant to release old imprinted patterns we learn from our past, causing an internal conflict to find that yearned-for stability. We also tend to blame others first without looking within. This is a common pattern I have seen, within myself especially.
My answer is to come to a conclusion be it with myself or those around me, if we are living a life that is a means to an end rather than a meaningful one, then to discover how our current circumstances are serving our purpose internally. One cannot find stability without discovering the purpose behind the stability they are searching for. For me, purpose can also be identified alongside meaning and meaning is only derived from serving, whether it is on either a larger scale, be it within society or serving ourselves in some way. If the purpose in life is to bring happiness, then we need to not forget that this is also fleeting, so to find meaning, we must be as open as possible and prepared to experience and connect with more ways that have the potential to bring great levels of happiness into our lives on a continuous basis. My question is, can we do this?
The discovery process for a purpose has been found to be a longwinded one, but only if we keep stalling and allowing ourselves to get tangled in the pattern of living life as a means to an end. We will remain in a constant state of limbo, of living in a temporary way where we are not present in the reality in which we are trying to be in We will be wrapped in a cycle of putting our own happiness on hold until what we want arrives, even if it means developing a dissatisfaction or finding comfort in the uncomfortable. This is, therefore, creating resentment within ourselves, emitting outward into our lives.
Rest assured in the knowing that rather than being in the pursuit of happiness we are in fact more in the pursuit of meaning, so lets acknowledge that until we find meaning, a feeling that can endure, solidify and maintain happiness, we cannot find that stability we yearn for, regardless what circumstances are thrown at us. So let us both be of positive service to others and a positive service to ourselves, whatever that means to us, and bring a true sense of happiness within.